Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Comfortable with the skin you are in



After 30+ years in this body, I am getting used to it. I am learning, just like everyone else, to love it and be thankful for what I have been given. The emergence of this Me who is content with herself, doesn't mean that I don't strive to fix my little (or BIG) imperfections, just that I accept them while I work on them. Accept that I am not, nor will ever be, 20 again, and that is OK. I strive for balance and health.

I have never suffered from any great body image pitfalls, and I believe part of that was because, growing up my mother never focused on her outside, and always taught us it was what was in the inside that really counted.

Having a little girl I find that I strive even harder to be happy with my body, and feel comfortable in my own skin. I try to be healthy in all aspects of my life and to promote love and beauty from within. As I am getting older, being "healthier" is of more importance to me for a multitude of reasons. I focus more on being healthy and fit than on being "skinny". I won't lie and say that I've never wished of looking like Megan Fox or anyone else with a hot body etc, but I don't have TV and have never been "enamored" by the stars, really, so being fit is more for me and my enjoyment of what I can do with this body (ie climb the stairs without panting, run around with my 4yr old, go hiking with ease, kickboxing, windsurfing, etc).

Having said that I think those teenage years are hard on girls, so I am trying to instill a sense of beauty from within as well as a desire of health in my little girl to give her the tools she needs to brave those tween years with strength and the least amount of pitfalls. The rise of eating disorders is scary! And maybe I can impart a bit of what I have now learned on to her. But most importantly I believe she, as well as others, need role models that are comfortable in their own skin. And role models whom promote balance and health. All things in moderation, is a good motto.

Are you comfortable in the skin you are in?

26 comments:

  1. Kelly!
    So glad to see this post.
    For much of my life, i have been a "husky" "chunky" "pleasantly plump" girl. When I was 13 i ended up at Weight Watchers only to gain 5 pounds!

    Somehow, although i too wouldn't complain if my body was like the latest celebrity, i always loved my body. I felt that it was strong, healthy, and for the most part beautiful..(minus the stretch marks on the upper thighs...heehee) but other than than, all good, in fact, all great! I would actually thank my dad for that. He always said that it didn't matter what you looked like, as long as you were good and nice.
    Which, i think i am ;-)

    And now, as a pregnant woman, i feel stronger, beautiful, and more in love with my body than ever before.

    Thanks for the great post!

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  2. My blog today is about this very thing.

    I've lived with a funhouse mirror in my head for too long...with God's help, I'm letting it go. Going for strenth and health instead, and it only took me, well, almost 50 years!

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  3. That's a wonderful way to be, happy. Love it!

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  4. What a gorgeous post! I love the pictures in the beginning too.

    It is so important to provide strong, healthy role models for our young girls. Mine is only 3 but I worry about her teen years constantly. I can only hope that I give her the tools to be able to fight her way through those years of teen angst and peer pressure.

    Thanks for sharing this!

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  5. So important to counteract contemporary body dysmorphia. What a lucky little girl your daughter is. You sound very centered.

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  6. I wish I could be comfortable with my body but sadly, I'm not...I still see myself in the mirror and think that I'm too overweight. I hate that, and I hate that other girls feel that way, too. I remember as a kid feeling that way from watching people in the movies and being jealous of other girls at school.

    I really appreciate you sharing this...it's definitely something I'd like to work on.

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  7. Having survived cancer, I can say with honesty that I am comfortable with my body - it can withstand a whole lot more than I previously gave it credit for! Oddly enough, however, I found that the times when I felt most uncomfortable with my body was during those times when my friends were busy bashing their own bodies and using my figure as a launching point for their loathsome self-bashing. Why must women feel compelled to slice themselves to pieces in order to bond with one another? Yech!

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  8. I did not accept my body until I retired. I wish there was some way to shield our young girls from all the brain washing they get from movies, magazine ads, TV programs, diet ads, etc. that everyone needs to be skinny. It would be so wonderful if they did not hold themselves up to unrealistic role models. Good luck, and I really mean it, not being sarcastic.

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  9. i am 42 and the skin i am in is still tough to love. not physically, but in other ways. i think an overall acceptance of who we are is so vital and i am really attempting to drive that home with my teenage daughter. i've written a few posts about it as well. good stuff you've got here. thanks.

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  10. I am certainly not the weight that i wish I was... but I am ok with that. I'm thankful to be healthy. I love this post & couldn't agree more. I have 3 daughters... I try to never talk badly about myself... & that's important for them. I want them to love themselves & know that they are beautiful no matter what. the world has enough bad things to say about them anyway. I want them to be confident & strong despite that.

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  11. I've definitely reached that stage, found a lot more balance and am learning that life doesn't stand still for anyone.

    Liked your post, very positive.

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  12. Im 22 and I confess that I've always been a little too weight concious , even to the point of suffering hypoglycemia once. But I have realised that in the end its just me and myself. If I suffer its not gonna matter to anyone else but me and my family, so its my happiness and contentment that matters even if it comes with looks which are not exactly picture perfect ! If you're happy from the inside, it will reflect !!

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  13. This was inspiring!

    I'm decidedly not comfortable with the skin I'm in. I've struggled with that all my life, and my family was not a very big help either. I was doing SlimFast when I was in SIXTH GRADE and my mom didn't stop me.

    The thinnest I've been was when I was 18-19 and weighed between 125-130 pounds. I thought I was a hog back then. Now I WISH I weighed that little. It drives my boyfriend nuts because no matter what, I'm always going to have this awful, skewered vision of myself. I'm never happy. :(

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  14. I loved this post, beauty truly is within.

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  15. great post!! i'm a new follower of your blog and definitely love it. i was overweight my whole life and had weight loss surgery at 18. it's been quite a journey to acceptance from there. it's really beautiful to see someone write about this so candidly. can't wait to read your other posts :)

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  16. awesome post Kelly! you're in a goooooooooood place.

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  17. Thanx so much for the love :) and I truly do believe that beauty does shine from within :)

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  18. Oh I can leave a comment!
    It is so very important to be comfortable in our skin! We spend entirely too much time worrying about how we look...there is too much life to be lived without wasting all that time with worry. I do think we need to work at healthy but ultimately, happy is the best...my new life motto is "love it or lump it"!

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  19. Yea!!!! Now I can show you the luv!!

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  20. Love this post! I am pretty comfortable in my skin but of course there are things I would change. Not major, just shed a few pouunds. It just doesn't seen all that important to me! This body is only temporary. I have 3 girls and want them to be healthy and love themselves... But not be so consumed in looks. I love that you don't do TV! We went 7 yrs with no TV and I must say I didn't miss much!!!

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  21. Thanks so much for this post. I'm happy to link to it on my blog. Such an important message that we can never hear too often!

    Tamara G. Suttle, M.Ed.,LPC
    http://www.AllThingsPrivatePractice.com
    http://www.TamaraSuttle.com

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  22. Thanks you for writing about this. I am not a mother, but the well being of young girls is something I feel passionate about and I write about it often.

    High-fives!

    Do I feel comfortable in my skin? Overall, yes. But I have my down days. Our culture is tough on us in this regard. It's a life learning process, I think.

    Love to you and all the other ladies out there.

    <3

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  23. Glad to hear I am not the only one. i believe this positive message is so important, not only for ourselves but for the future generation.

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  24. Yes, I am comfortable in my own skin... and I LOVE IT! :D I appreciate it dearly, because I wasn't always happy with my body. I used to have a terrible body image. As I look back, it astounds me. My body was amazing, and I didn't even know it. All of our bodies are amazing - amazing gifts... and we should love them! I am so thankful for my body and will always take care of it to the best of my ability. I hope that my children and grandchildren will see my example and be inspired to do the same. :) I think it is important because it affects our emotional and spiritual lives immensely. What is on the inside matters so much more than the outside... but if you take care of the body, your spirit is happier and healthier, too; and that much better and happier for it!

    Rock on with the good example, Kelly! ;D

    Corine :)

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  25. SO totally true Miss Corine :) I am currently trying to get myself back into shape, as I have been not so active due to a broken toe.... and my body sure needs to be woken up from its slumber!!!! I always feel better when I am more active.

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